Christmas Cats

We’ve had an infestation in our Christmas tree.

Our new kittens have taken kindly to the giant cat toy we put up in the family room last weekend.

It will be our barest tree ever, as the notion of hanging anything on it seems kind of pointless. We might as well just throw the ornaments on the ground, since that’s where they would eventually end up.

The kids think having kittens popping in and out of the branches of our Christmas tree is great fun. And I don’t disagree. They do make us laugh. Besides, who wants to spend the entire holiday season stressing over cats crawling around inside an artificial Fraser Fir?

At least they’re not climbing up the curtains anymore.

Homeschool Stereotypes

Over the years, we’ve heard all the negative homeschool stereotypes. You know, like we’re just a bunch of anti-social gun nuts teaching our children that the Earth is 6,000 years old and the President is a Muslim communist.

Okay, so that may actually be true of a few homeschoolers I know, but it’s just not the case for the vast majority of us who are simply trying to give our kids a better education.

I’ve talked with my kids about stereotypes, and how unfair it is to label a person based on misplaced assumptions.

Apparently, I’ll need to have that talk with my daughter again.

After I stop laughing.

Yesterday, we were driving down a residential street when I spotted a group of three or four teenagers throwing rocks at a cat trying to escape up a wooden fence into the safety of someone’s backyard.

I brake for cat abuse, by the way.

Actually, I yanked the steering wheel hard to the left, did a 180 in the street, and roared our van back to the spot where the kids had been.

They scattered like cowardly rats before I could even roll down my window to chew them out.

Watching them flee, my feline-worshiping daughter piped up from the back seat: “That was really mean of them. They must go to public school.”

Christmas LOLcats

My kids have struck again, with another photo of their favorite kitty.

This time we have competing LOLcat captions. One is mine, the other is my kids’, but I won’t tell you which is which.

Vote for your favorite in the comments. We have lunch at McDonald’s riding on the outcome!



Happiness Is A Warm Cat

This is Basil’s favorite spot during the winter. All warm and toasty by the fire.

These days of crackling fires and cups of hot cocoa are drawing to a close. Temperatures are up, the snow is melting, the streets are clear of ice. Spring is just around the corner, and soon Basil will find a new favorite spot in a cool, shady place.

Wouldn’t you just know it… Halfway through this post, I get up to look out the window and find it’s snowing again. Big fat flakes. Looks like winter isn’t over yet.

Go on and curl up by the fire, Basil. I’ll be outside shoveling.

Tree Cat

What is it about cats and Christmas trees?

Within seconds of setting up the tree in our family room, our cat Basil had firmly planted himself underneath it. And there he sits most of the day.

I don’t know what he’s doing. Waiting for Santa Claus? Maybe he thinks he’s in the great outdoors and is just enjoying the fresh air and nature. Apparently he hasn’t figured out that our tree is a fake one.

When Basil was a kitten, we would set up a real tree each Christmas and he would chew on the branches. His litterbox was always very interesting that time of year, with bits of green needles and silver tinsel mixed together in his waste.

The kids think he’s cute, sitting there under the tree and stubbornly refusing to come out for anything but his own basic needs. I suspect that he believes the tree is a present for him, one big pine-scented cat toy that we’ve placed in the house solely for his amusement.

What The Kids Heard

Here’s what the kids heard me say today:

“What do you want from me now?”
“I’ll feed you when I have time.”
“Nope. No love for you. Sorry.”
“If you’re going to throw up, try to do it in the basement.”
“Speak English!”
“Stop wiping your butt on the carpet.”
“Get off the couch and go sit on your pillow.”
“Please don’t chew on the electrical cord.”
“If you bite my nose, you’ll be locked in the basement all day.”

Do you think my dumb cats listen to me at all?!